Is it bad that I want to be rich? Is it not a good thing that one of my goals in this life is to be wealthy? Is money evil? Or is the love of money the root of all evil? Is having more than enough money the problem? Or is what you do with the excess money a problem?
I have a problem with people who have a problem with pursuing financial stability and then some. I have a problem with people who have a problem with other people who do not want to be poor or live paycheck to paycheck.
I cant stand when people make statements like "money isnt important" or " I rather have character/love/family/(insert any thing that is suppose to be good) than money".
Who said I had to choose between love and money? Who said I had to choose between character and money? Who said I had to choose between family and money? My God, some people act like those who are rich are the nastiest, lonliest, evil, unloving villains of the earth! Not saying you dont have those type of people, but does it mean that the end all be all to being rich is being an evil person?
I do agree that loving money or putting money before God and family and other important things isnt a good thing. However money do have its place of importance. Love shouldnt be excluded. However money shouldnt either. I dont see anything virtuous about struggling to pay for the necessities. I dont see anything good about not being able to give or help others because you can only help yourself. I dont see anything righteous about putting your family through hard times. Now I dont think hard times make you a bad person because it can happen to anybody, but I believe there is something wrong with a poor mentality.
Since I disappeared from thin air, I might as well update on my life. No more perms and no more extra fat for me. I have decided to go natural. Not because I feel more black. I was as black as I was going to be relaxed. Not that I feel more concious and aware and in tune with life and spirituality. That hasnt changed. I just think natural hair is better style wise. I think every african american woman should rock their natural tresses because our hair is beautiful and versatile. I think its hot to be able to rock your hair in cute kinky curly styles and if I want to switch it up and rock it straight I can always flat iron it. If I want to put some curls to my press I can. Then go right back to naturally kinky. Being just relaxed is oh so boring and typical. But hey thats just my opinion. Yes I am on weight loss mode. Will I tell you how much I weigh. NO. A girl never tells her weight nosey. However I will say that my goal is 150. What am I doing to lose weight? Counting calories, dance aerobics, and the gym (when I feel like it). I do not deprive myself of food that I like. However do make sure what I eat is nutricious, delicious, w/ small indulgencies within my calorie limit. Dance aerobics is the bulk of my weight loss. I totally recommend Quiena Riberia samba dance workout tapes. Its fun and will work your behind out
How many black parents teach their daughters about going to the gyno at a young age? I dont think many do. Our statistics concerning HIV and out of wed lock children are too detrimental not too. I feel like there is not enough talk about sexual education at a young age. Maybe because parents feel like they are just too young or have too much confidece in their daughters concerning abstinence. I know men dont go to the doctor as often unless something is wrong with them. However, what is our excuse as women considering we have doctors specialized for our feminin private parts. We can prevent unecessary things in our lives and be healthy women by taking advantage of whats available. Parents dont just teach abstinence alone. Teach the importance of safe sex just in case! Teach the importance of how to take care of that vital part of her body. Teach about contraceptives for her safety at the same time also teaching about abstinence. Nothing wrong with teachin both. There is nothing wise about witholding information that can be a help in case she gets weak. She is a fallible human being. Its better to be a girl who lost her virginity than a girl with a life threatening disease or single mother. This is coming from a single mother! Take her to the gyno and allow the doctor to educate her if you dont know or too shame faced!
I thought about all this sitting in the gyno's office. I was getting the birth control patch. The pill is not going to do it for me. Hell, I got it bad when it comes to taking vitamins on a regular, and I damn sure not taking needles. I wish I would have known about the patch long time ago. Its so easy to use! One patch per week for 3`weeks. One week off. Check out information including side effects at http://www.orthoevra.com/index.html.
I know yall be seeing that commercial for Gardasil. Do you know there are stds out there that a condom cant protect from? Hell, a little girl may not be having sexual intercourse but maybe fooling around with a boyfriend and still get a disease! HPV is one of them. This is an std that effects women! Most men dont know that they have it, and screenings dont show up for guys. However it shows up on girls pap smears and can cause cancer. However Gardasil helps prevent that. However you wont know about all of this stuff unless you go to the gyno. If your a young girl reading this tell your mother to take you. If your a parent take your daughter. Talk to your young nieces. Nobody is going to responsible for your body but you! For more information on HPV check out http://www.cdc.gov/STD/HPV/STDFact-HPV.htm.
If anybody wondering why I am getting birth control. Your girl getting married soon, and we not trying to make a baby as soon as we get hitched.
Anyways, I just wanted to share that with my fellow sisters. Stay blessed.
Matthew 10:16 (KJV) Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves.
Okay. V-day is right around the block. So you only got like...what? 5 more days? WOW. What are you going to do? Dont know what to do? Its cool! I got you. Satin is going to hook you up with gift ideas and even date ideas (single or with someone).
Gifts for Her *Gentlemen, please dont be cliche. Know what she likes.... teddy bear, roses, and chocolate/candy (ZzZz...cliche. unless she likes that stuff.) her signature fragrance makeup pallette by her favorite brand cute outfit or sexy lingerie in her size, please spa or shopping gift card a purse that goes well with her fave shoe a shoe that match her fave purse a nice new luxirious bedset (work it brotha) a cellphone or pda she always wanted duh...diamonds
Gifts for Him *Ladies its not all about you on this day. Reciprocate! teddy bear, roses, and chocolate/candy (ummm he is a dude, right? so treat him like one) mp3 player of his favorite songs dvd set of favorite television series gaming console or video games he raves about tickets to his favorite sports team rose petals leading up to you in the bed (ooh la la) atheletic sneakers of his favorite brand a hard drive with his favorite music and pictures of you & him on it magazine subscription of subscription to whatever he is into excercise or sports equipment a really nice watch, silk tie, silk boxers, & fave cologne (a man with taste of course)
Things to Do Alone take out food, rental movies, and cry yourself to sleep (depressing) go to a spa take yourself shopping go on a vacation single events like a dance? spend time with friends & family hit the casino & buffet but dont overdo it do something extraordinary like sky diving speed dating or have your friends set you up on a blind date whatever you do just dont stay at home, please?
Things to Do w/ Someone just look at each and four walls (come on now, yall do that everyday) picnic by the lake camp under the stars dinner & a movie game of Scrabble by the fire place w/ wine & Vday chocolate/candy candelight home cooked dinner check out a play go to your local comedy show take ballroom dancing lessons walk down town and jump on horse & carriage (available in some places) good time to propose (winks)
I hope that helps somebody. Those are just some things I randomly came up with. Concerning gift giving, you know your guy or gal more than I. Therefore with that knowledge I would think that you can come up with something special. Doesnt have to be expensive. I personally love board games. I would take a board game that I dont already have in my collection over diamonds any day. Satin will murder you with a 3 letter word in Scrabble, trust. But thats just me. Anyways, I cant wait for this weekend. Me & my fiance are going to have so much fun and I hope you all do as well. Stay blessed!
John 13:34 (KJV) A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
Alot of people say that blacks & whites shouldnt have intergrated. I am not sure how I feel about that really. I was pretty naiive to racism when I was young. Though I believe cold hard racism still exists, I do believe Obama's presidency reveals that its not as bad as it could be. We still got our racial hangups.
Hower I am happy and grateful for the many blessings bestowed upon me. The earthquake in Haiti was really sad and my heart goes out to them. The donations through text messaging was really a good idea and very profound to this event. Atleast I havent heard it used for anything else but Haiti. I just wonder what happens if people dont pay the phon bill.....
Anyways, when I think over my life I realized I really have not been through anything super drastic. I had a few little setbacks but nothing extremely tragic. Makes me wonder how I will deal if faced with something serious....scary thought.
On a lighter note, I cant wait till Valentines Day weekend! I already know how I want to do my makeup. A sexy sultry black brown smokey eye & a pink pouty lip. Thanks to Icraiz of Youtube, I instantly fell in love with this look! What do you think? Can I rock it or should I drop it?
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Friday we plan to go to dinner and a movie. I want to see Valentines Day. It got so many great actors and actresses in it. I also noticed a few other movies coming out in the future that I want to see. Clash of the Titans remake (I love the old one), Prince of Persia (that game is so fun), and many many more! Anyways, that Saturday we are going to the casino. Both of us have never been to a casino! What kept me from the casino is because I had a mindset that gambling was a sin plus im too stingy to be wasting money like that. Matter of fact I probably wont even gamble. Not saying I have never sinned because im pretty sure I do everyday (example. cussing when I hit my toe, breaking the law by speeding, giving people the finger behind my computer screen when they type something mean to me). However I dont see anywhere in the bible that talks about it specifically. Now that I think about it, there are alot of things in church that I thought was wrong that the bible never spoke against. See, if your believer in Christ or interested in becoming a Christian it is so important to read the bible for our own damn selves! I swear a preacher can tell you anything. I think anybody starting out wanting to know the Lord should just read The Word for themselves and find a church that lines up with that word instead of letting a preacher tell you what The Word says. But if anybody can give me scriptural evidence on gambling, please do so at your earliest convenience. Okay im rabbit trailing LOL. Sunday (which is Valentines Day) we are staying in and I plan to do a gift exchange & a homecook candelight dinner & Monday we chillaxin. Ahhh suki suki now...
Speaking of gifts....ladies, Valentines Day should be for the man as well. Its not all about us, and I do hope we not giving him teddy bears & roses. I mean really? If he likes it then okay, though I wonder about his sexual preference. But, real talk lets not forget about our boyfriends & spouses on this day. He should be treating you and you should treat him. I will have a list of Valentines Day gift ideas for not only women for any men who read my blog but also the men cause they need love too. Lets keep it mutual.
I really dont have much to say..I probably shouldnt have rambled like I did about V day until the closer that time comes. But when I get excited about something I talk about it, plan real early, and day dream like a little girl LOL.
Anyways yall stay blessed!
Isaiah 40:31 (KJV) But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
I guess I will jump on the 42% of black women have never been married bandwagon since it seems to be the hot topic of the month.
abc.com
First of all that ABC Special was a big coon show. If your going to determine unavailable black men dont you think they could have atleast mentioned how many black men were actually married? Nope they had to mention how many men were in jail, without a high school diploma, and whatnot. Totally threw black men under the bus. Oh but not so fast.....it also told the whole world how undesirable we are. Successful and cant get a man. It didnt even mention some of the problems black women have that would make them undesirable in comparison just to be fair. It made black men look bad directly and us black women look bad indirectly. I love how the one chic who was hoping to get the white man's number made herself look like an absolute fool. It made us all look bad. I really hate how that became a news topic. Couldnt we keep that on BET or TVOne? The whole world shakes their head at us because we embarrass ourselves!
Relationships between black men and black women are obviously not looking good. First of all I am not a relationship expert. I am just an opionated individual. Therefore I believe these are the reasons why we cant get it together:
First of all, we both have major pride issues. If you want to talk about slavery and what not...whatever. However pride comes before destruction and both black men and black women can not get off their high horse when it comes to listening to each other. Listening needs to take place before we can understand each other. Black women dont want to hear what black men have to say. Black men dont want to hear what black women got to say. Anything negative that is said is automatically going to passed off as black men or black women bashing which becomes too sensative to hear the nitty gritty truth. One wants the other to make corrections first instead of choosing to correct themselves. Lack of personal accountability. Finger pointing & blame game. A total Adam & Eve scenario. Black men and black women think they are better than each other, and competing with each other instead of realizing that we are suppose to be on the same team...sickens me.
Now concerning black women (since I am a black woman and believe in personal accountability)....there are millions reasons why black women dont go to the alter as often as other races of women do. WARNING. This is my honest opinion. If your a black woman your probably not going to like what you are about to read.
Some black women just really dont want to be married.
Some black men dont want to be married which will effect any black woman that is with him.
Some black women want to sow their wild oats in their twenties and then want to all the sudden get married while their 30s or 40s cause their "biological clock" is ticking. Men dont really care about marriage as much as women do. By that age, men are either looking at younger women or is saying to hell with marriage. Not all men but some men. I dont want to say most....cause I really dont know the statistics. Keep in mind. This is my opinion. College years are the years when you are in your prime. I personally believe those social years should be taken advantage of when it comes to finding a good mate. Unfortunately we have been taught "have fun", "you dont need a man", "focus on the books because a man will come later". Which we should focus on education, career, and whatnot. However we should also be able to take the necessary steps to create good relationships as well. Balance is key.
Some black women spend too much time with a man who is either no good or he may be good but dont want to get married though they themselves want to be. I see too much of this. They have this idea that they can change a man. Yet black men understand you cant turn a ho into a house wife. I wish women can learn from the men in that regard. You cant turn a no good negro into a husband. Black women being loyal to the wrong dude is nothing but a waste of time when they could be married to a great guy or atleast married to a guy who wants to be married. I have seen women in relationships 5, 10 yrs and no marriage. If a man can get all the benefits without having to marry a woman, he wont marry her. So back to wrong choices in choosing a mate....some choose a man with swagger but dont know how to treat a woman right, and gets jaded and starts turning off a potential good guy with an issue she had with a previous relationship. Dont let me get on the mistake of getting pregnant by the wrong man and how that can effect your dating life (I am guilty of this one)....
Another thing is the negative stereotype of attitude. We seem to have the whole world put our face in the dictionary in relation to the word "confrontational". Some of us are not, however the many more that fits Sapphire to a tee will forever prove that we are. Now I have been called confrontational by an individual who started mess with me first. However it doesnt matter who started it. A black woman will automatically be dubbed confrontational regardless if it was valid reason or not. I really feel like this stereotype shoots us in the foot more than anything, because nobody specially a man wants to be around that. Even the bible says I rather be on a roof top then in a house with a brawling woman....damn.
As stated before.....we wasnt raised on it. Mama, granny, aunts all telling you "you dont need a man". Enough said. I notice alot of older black women who have been divoriced really dont have the desire to marry again and pass that onto their children. There is this negative view of black men. Even if we prefer black men, its still there cause it is openly revealed on television shows, blogs, & other publications. So alot of black men are resentful of this. Hence why black men are starting to speak out against black women openly....sad.
We are notorious for having ridiculous standards. He got to be tall as Shaq, fine as a Morris Chestnut (man and he is sexy), and make money like Bill Gates. Get real sister. And when we do find someone remotely close to our fairytale he dont even contain the standard that is most important like sane, nonabusive, respectful...come on now. If your going to list all these shallow requirments, atleast require that he treats you right.
I really hate to say this....but from my observation us black women really dont mind going outside the house looking any kind of way LOL. I use to do this myself. However its really not a good look. I am talkin head rag, sweats, tweety bird house shoes, the works! Men do care about looks and femininty, you know. Enough said.
So now that I probably pissed off my readers. That is my opinion on how black women can contribute to her own singleness. I am not saying that black men dont have a fault in this....however at the end of the day we cant change nobody but ourselves, sisters. So thats why I think its important that we be real about how we can shoot our ownselves in the foot. If there is anything yall dont learn about my blog, I am all about personal accountability.
Another thing I notice everytime you hear black women explain why they dont have a man..."black men are in jail, gay, or dont have an education". *Rolls Eyes* I have never equated those factors on why I am single. All that tells me is why I avoid some black men. I dont have an experience with actually dating black men in jail, gay (atleast me knowing it), or is not going anywhere in life. If I am going to talk about me having dating problems, I would probably mention my experiences in dating and not some negative statistics that I dont even fool with. Because I can think of a few flaws about black men without mentioning niggas in jail, niggas without a diploma, niggas on the downlow. Why? Because I dont mess with niggas like that. The next time I see a show like that I want to see black women name things they have experienced. Now if they experienceD entering into relationships with negros with a sentence, without a diploma, & all the other crap you hear then I can understand. Heck I can get on arrogance, lack of knowledge on a woman's feelings, work over family, wanting to be treated like a king, yet not reciprocate treating women like a queen, the tendency to blame all the problems on everybody else but himself, wanting to be the leader and really wants to be a tyrant in the relationship, disrespectful but wants to be respected....I can name a multitude of things I see about black men that I have experienced that has nothing to do with low-life men. Alot of black men want to talk about black women dating thugs. I never dated a thug, so my grievances is including black men who are middle class and up.
I just wish black people can be real and civil when talking about relationship problems so we can make the necessary corrections together. The reason anybody is single is either because you couldnt work it out with someone you previously dated, and its either your fault, his fault, or both. Its either somebody not approaching you. Its either you not approaching them. However nobody talks about that when it comes to being single. Everybody trying to save face. Its not all the black men's fault, black women. Its not all the black women's fault, black men.....what say you?
Proverbs 16:18 (KJV) 18 Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.
Hello. I'm Satin Doll, but you can call me Satin. Welcome to my personal blog, where I simply express my thoughts, beliefs, interests, and anything I think is worthy of conversation. Noticed I said "I". All opinions are entitled, so if you must comment do so in truth. Stay blessed!
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